Feelings are like good haircolor?!

Oh my friends,

Tis the season for Big Feelings.

 
 

I read the news and I'm afraid.

I work and I'm HAPPY.

I miss my grandmother and I'm melancholy.

I stand in line and I'm antsy.

Last night at my daughter's dance showcase

I was all of the above.

A tiny, pre-K ballerina froze on stage

and I felt anxious.

Her teacher came out from behind the curtains

giant smile

loving hands

and the two started dancing together

and I burst into heart-ful tears.

I see that my own little dancer

is not so tiny anymore

and I feel grateful 

but wistful

and when she walks onto the stage

I know she is scare-cited

and so I am scare-cited

and when she starts to dance

I smile so hugely my cheeks hurt.

*

Here's the thing about feelings:

when you really REALLY feel them, 

they morph and move.

They're like good haircolor:

multidimensional

with undertones

and highlights.

When I allow myself

fully

to feel overwhelmed at the holidays,

I discover so many components:

nervousness
nostalgia
gratitude
worry
excitement
impatience
wonder
joy
sorrow
love

Overwhelmed shimmers and moves.

It's big, but it doesn't consume me

because I am allowing it to flow.

So

How do we allow feelings?

We feel them.

Which can be scary,

because some feelings are really big.

To feel feelings fully

without getting swept away

employ an observer.

That is:

watch yourself feeling feelings.

Notice how they affect your body,

and describe them:

nervousness a churning in the upper belly

excitement fireworks in the heartspace

sorrow like a heavy blanket over the shoulders

joy like sunlight in every cell.

Be curious and courageous

as you allow them to rise and fall,

as you watch them move and morph.

TRUST

that they will move and morph

when you let them flow.

natalie millerComment