Two questions to light you up (& burn it down?) ⚡⚡⚡


I am over here living a dream life these days.

Completely fabulous.


This weekend, I'm at an idyllic retreat center in the Virginia countryside,

leading my annual semi-silent retreat.

So: communing with badass women

recharging our batteries

and listening to no one but ourselves.

(Wish you were here!)

Last weekend, I was in California

perched on the edge of the ocean at Pismo Beach

facilitating workshops for a giant bunch of life coaches-in-training.

My co-presenter was a fabulous

powerfully feminist

super D I V A 

Master Coach colleague:

Terry DeMeo.

Terry asked me two questions

that have stirred up so much energy for me,

and I wanted to share them with you.

First, she wondered:

Where in your life do you have to be Good?

(For me, it's in mothering.

I worry about being a Good Mom.)


eyes twinkling and fierce

she asked:

If you were a Bad Mom, what would you do?

Because Terry knows

(and you know, too)

the patriarchy needs women to behave.

To check themselves.

To put everyone else's desires

above our own.

To give ourselves just a little.

Juuuuuuuuust enough

to keep our souls from starving.

As one of the badass women

here on retreat put it:

"It's like I'm always just

nibbling around the edges."

Enough of that.

It's time to open our beautiful mouths

and take enormous bites out of life.


Where in your life do you have to be Good?

What would a Bad (wife, boss, householder, mother, daughter) do?

I hope your answer

makes you a little queasy.

(Mine did)

And then I hope you

find a doable step in that direction.

A small move

And lift your chin,

twirl on your heel,

spread your wings,

and fucking go for it.

natalie millerComment