Feminists got no business Faking It.
Hello from Pittsburgh, dearies!
I'm traveling on this Spring Forward day.
I'm here for a workshop on book writing (!)
and fully feeling both super excited and also that
"Do I even belong here
can I do this
will they like me
will I like them
what the hell do I WEAR"
Fairly common advice in this situation
when one is not quite sure one is up to the task,
is to Fake It Til You Make It.
That is my least favorite advice
I have written about this before,
in this piece about Michelle Obama
and her far more empowering approach,
which I shorthanded in 2016 as
Keep Becoming Who You Are.
Today I revisited that piece
to remind myself:
1. Being willing to hold -
and even to SHOW -
uncertainty and vulnerability
is f a a a a a a a a a r more powerful
than pretending you've got it all figured out.
2. Belonging isn't a status.
It's a feeling
that arises when I feel free
to be my whole, evolving self.
Anxiousness and all.
So my friends:
Where are you feeling a little imposter-y?
Where are you becoming
more generous with your talents?
Where are you stretching
to be more visible
or to try something new?
Where are you worried
you might not belong
or might not be up to the task?
Wherever that is for us,
that faking it only takes us away from ourselves.
and that's the wrong way to go.
embracing the whole experience
being willing to hold and even to express
the fear / doubt / uncertainty
that's the fast hot track
to fully belonging
EVERYWHERE we go.
Fuck faking it.
Let's openly do what all the humans are doing:
make it up as we go along.